Alone, all alone
by OnceUponAnatomyMinds
Summary: Based in season 2. Meredith goes missing and with everyone ending on awkward terms with her, nobody goes looking. What happens when she turns up 11 days later in a coma and it is up to her so called friends to save her. Will she make it or will she die thinking that everyone she had grown a relationship with didn't even care to look for her?
1. Chapter 1

**Okay so, my crazy self has decided to start Grey's from the beginning again and it's so weird watching old episodes and seeing them all at their most innocent. So, in the first few episodes of season one, Meredith and Derek are dealing with a rape victim who bit of her rapists *thing* and Meredith is stuck with it all day. She expresses to Derek when the girl is in a coma and alone that she knows how she feels, you know, being alone in a situation like that, but Derek goes on to say that she would have her mother and all (of course, not knowing about her mothers condition back then)... But then it got me thinking, when everything was still going down between everyone in season 2 (Izzie and Alex fighting, Cristina and Burke, Addison/Meredith/Derek) they are not the closest knit group, and, if something were to happen to Meredith, would anyone actually look for her and be there for her?**

 **So, this baby was born. I am sensing a 2 or 3 chaptered thing going on here so this is just thrown in the middle of my other two stories while I work on them.**

 **This is based during the episode where the woman has like 5 babies, and Izzie is mad at Meredith for interacting with Alex after he cheated on her. It basically goes from that scene...**

 **It's a bit of a mess and I don't know where it's going to go, but if you want more, drop me a review, if not, I will leave it at the horrible cliffhanger I am ending it on :D Up to you guys...**

 **I am going to try and update 3 years and Beaten and Broken tonight or tomorrow so, stay tuned for some chapters. In the meantime, enjoy this!**

Meredith couldn't help but stare at Izzie as she expressed her feelings, looking away slightly.

"You're basically calling me a whore Izzie" Meredith said dryly, Izzie scoffing slightly, reading the chart in her hands yet another time, Meredith looking back up at her.

"Well what would you call yourself Meredith? Because you're not a victim anymore, you are just plain milking it. Leave me alone" Meredith just stood, walking out the room, Izzie wiping away a stray tear from her cheek. As she turned the corner away from the NICU, she couldn't help but roll her eyes as she saw Derek coming up the corridor, trying to quickly find an escape but realising there wasn't one.

"You look stressed" He stated, stopping her in her tracks.

"Yeah well I have things to be stressed about" She shot back shortly, looking at Derek who's eyes were soft and comforting, but Meredith was not in the mood.

"Want to talk about it?"

"No Dr Shepherd I do not want to talk about it" She exclaimed, Derek turning to look at her properly.

"Meredith-"

"No Derek, I am done with this. I can't do it"

"I want to leave Addison Meredith, I don't want her"

"I gave you a chance to choose between me and here Derek, and when you chose, you chose her. What's changed?"

"I love you in ways I can't love her. I didn't want to throw away those 11 years but, what is 11 years to a life time" She couldn't help but feel her eyes well up, shaking her head with an exasperated sigh.

"I am a mess Derek. I make things complicated and I screw things up and I can't do that again. You are just better off without me" She turned on her heel and walked away, leaving Derek alone in the hallway. He groaned out loud, walking away to his post-operative rounds. He found Addison walking out of a patients room, sighing when she grinned widely at him.

"So Derek, I was thinking we could book reservations tonight and go for a meal. Just you and me" He couldn't stop the words as they left his mouth, glad that the hallway was empty.

"I want a divorce Addison"

"You what?" She chocked out, her eyes wide in horror.

"I tried but I can't- I want a divorce"

"This is about Meredith isn't it?"

"Why do you put the blame of everything onto her?" Derek exclaimed annoyingly, throwing the chart he had in his hand onto the nurses desk in frustration.

"Because Derek, you ran away and started a new life with the woman! Why can't you just put it in your past and move on like you told me you would try and do?"

"Because Addison, you are my past. You are the thing of the past and Meredith, she- she isn't the only reason I want this"

"Yeah, of course she isn't. You can sign the damn papers and I'll be out of your hair within the week" She said bitterly, running away from him defeated.

* * *

Meredith sat on the bench in the locker room with her head in her hands, looking up when Cristina and George walked in, the two looking ready to leave.

"What's up with you?" Cristina asked, opening her locker pulling her bag out.

"Derek" Meredith mumbled, Cristina scoffing slightly.

"As always"

"What did you say?"

"I said like always Meredith. It's always him" Cristina shouted, Meredith leaning back in defence.

"I'm sorry, is my life becoming too much for you?"

"Frankly, yes it is. I can't cope with your McDreamy drama any more Meredith. I have problems with Burke, your's always prioritise. It's like you can't focus on anything else in your life, and I am done being there for it all. I can't do it anymore" She left the locker room, Meredith looking to George who was staring at the floor.

"Go on, say it" Meredith challenged, standing from the bench.

"You need to move on Meredith. There are harder things in life than you and your boyfriend troubles" He muttered, slamming the locker, following Cristina out. Meredith felt a pain in her chest as she lashed out at the wall next to her, storming out, needing to distract herself. She finished her charting an hour later, turning to go for a coffee when she was blocked by Bailey and Richard, both staring at her.

"You are here 3 hours over your shift time" Bailey stated, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I know that, I just wanted to finish my check up on the babies and finish my rounds"

"Go home" She said, Meredith frowning.

"I was going to help Dr Montgomery Shepherd with the mother, I don't mind staying over for a few more hours"

"You are working too many hours Grey. Go home"

"But-" Richard interrupted her, his voice raised making her jump.

"Are you deifying orders Dr Grey?"

"No sir I was just-"

"Your superior is telling you to leave, so you need to leave. We don't need interns kissing up to their attending's and doing unnecessary work. It's frowned upon Dr Grey. We will take action if you refuse to follow orders again"

"I wasn't kissing up to anyone sir, the mother is showing signs of postnatal depression and needs a lot of support. I wanted to help but, if my service isn't need I guess I will leave" She shot back, storming away from the two who watched after her in shock. She didn't bother to change out of her scrubs as she grabbed her bag and headed for the reception, seeing Addison coming up the stairs she was going down.

"Addison, can you page me if there are any changes in the babies conditions?"

"Do you think kissing up to me is going to make me hate you less?" Meredith frowned, stopping in her tracks as Addison paused on the stairs, her face red and blotchy.

"Addison I wasn't-"

"I hope you are happy with yourself"

"I don't know what you are talking about" Meredith admitted openly, wondering what the hell had gotten into everyone tonight.

"You have been out to get me since I got here, and I understand you were in the dark about Derek's marriage with me but you have officially ended it, and I just hope you are satisfied with yourself"

"I never meant to do that" Meredith said slowly, realising Derek had clearly spoken to Addison since their encounter.

"You are just destroying everything in your path aren't you Meredith. You destroy everything in it's path and all you think about is the outcome for you and nobody else. I just, I hope you are satisfied" She carried on up the stairs, Meredith standing in shock in the middle of the stairs. It was official, Meredith had managed to piss off everyone in the hospital. How she didn't quite know, but two of those people were who she lived with and going home was not all that appealing, but staying at the hospital was not an option anymore either, and it was clear Cristina hated her so she couldn't even ask her for a night. SHe walked to her car, getting in and driving away. She drove for a while, unsure of where she was going or how long she was going to drive but she knew she just couldn't go home tonight. She felt tears well up in her eyes as she thought of all things that had gone down that night. _I am whore, a mess, a bad friend, a kiss ass and a marriage wrecker. Way to go Meredith_. She cringed as the rain got heavier, turning on her windscreen wipers, groaning as they made no difference and the front window got more and more blurred, blocking her view of the road. She decided on pulling over till it passed, or maybe even walking home in it, but as she started to pull into the side, she never saw that other car skidding and flipping into hers. Then, it all went black.

* * *

Alex walked into the locker room the next day, cringing when Izzie pushed passed him, Cristina sniggering.

"You are on a clear war path with her Alex" She said, him laughing sarcastically as he threw his bag into his locker, changing into his scrubs.

"Where is Meredith?" He asked, seeing she wasn't there and was clearly not leaving the hospital when he saw her last night. Cristina just shrugged, looking between Izzie and George who actually lived with her, but George mimicked Cristina's action, sitting down to tie his shoe lace.

"She wasn't as home this morning" He said, looking at the doorway as Bailey entered, looking at them all before frowning.

"Where is Grey?" Everyone looked around clueless, Alex pulling out his phone to call her.

"Her phone is going straight to voicemail" He said confused, Bailey rolling her eyes.

"You send a girl home for working too many hours and then she doesn't come back" She muttered to herself, ushering them all outside to assign them. Alex called Meredith's phone another few times, sighing in annoyance as they continued to go to voicemail, not even ringing. The day went by slowly, Alex balancing his phone between his shoulder as he carried his tray to the table, sitting down by Izzie who rolled her eyes, not bothering to argue with him as she was too tired.

"Who are you calling?" George asked with half a sandwich in his mouth, Alex shutting his phone again with a frown.

"Meredith. I have been trying her phone all day and she hasn't picked up" They all shared a look, Alex wondering what he was missing.

"Apparently Shepherd asked Addison for a divorce and then Addison went crazy on Meredith. All the nurses are talking about it, one of them overheard the conversation between Addison and Shepherd from inside a patients room and then a few saw the showdown between Meredith and her" Cristina explained, knowing that she would certainly take a day if she was Meredith. Plus the fact Izzie was clearly not liking the girl right now and they had certainly ended on bad terms last night.

"Rumours haven't stopped her before" Alex said, knowing that she had put up with worse the past few weeks. He dialled her number again, Izzie grunting and standing to leave when he put the phone to his ear. Days passed and Meredith still never showed for work, Alex growing more concerned as they days went on, Bailey, Richard and Derek mimicking his worry, though the others were not as concerned as they should have been.

"Have you heard from her today?" Bailey asked, Alex and Derek shaking their heads.

"Nothing. Should we start worrying? I mean- I have been to her mothers home and they said she hasn't been in at least a week and same with us doesn't return phone calls" Derek told them, Richard rubbing his hand over his head in frustration.

"Maybe she is taking after her mother, maybe she just left" He said, knowing that when Meredith was 5 Ellis left without another word and never come back. Maybe Meredith has done the same.

"No, she wouldn't do that, would she?" Alex wondered, calling her phone again. Nothing. It got to a week when George and Cristina started showing concern, joining Alex in the locker room who was holding a letter in his hand.

"What's that?"

"It's my results- I haven't opened them yet"

"Open them" Cristina urged, Alex shaking his head, putting it in his pocket.

"I told Meredith I would open the results with her" He admitted, Izzie scoffing.

"Hey Izzie, not know okay?" Cristina shot at her, Izzie standing her ground.

"Meredith has gone, just face it. We need to move on and stop mopping around. She is probably in LA at a fancy hospital doing big surgeries on sunburnt jocks in a OR with windows and a gallery in the sun" Izzie muttered, George frowning.

"She is our friend Izzie, and she is missing"

"Well I know that, nobody has shut up about it in a week" She replied, pushing past Bailey who was in the doorway, shaking her head showing her lack of knowledge.

"Where the hell are you Meredith?" Cristina mumbled to herself, them all following Bailey out the room. It got to 11 days, Derek sitting on a gurney with his head in his hands. Addison passed him, nudging his leg getting his attention.

"Have you heard anything?"

"No, it's been 11 days" He said angrily, Addison nodding, knowing that despite their lack of communication, she knew how much this was hurting him. His phone rang, interuptting their conversation. He answered, the number unknown.

"Hello"

 _"Is this Dr Shepherd?"_

"It is, who is this?" He watched Addison walk away, spotting Cristina who was on his service.

 _"I was given your number by your chief, Dr Webber. I am Dr Jones from Mercy West. 11 days ago we were brought a Jane Doe who had been in a severe car accident and after surgery has yet to wake up. She woke up briefly yesterday but worked herself up to a state where we had to put her under. We are transferring her to your hospital and was wondering if there was anything else you could do for her as we are full and need the space in ICU"_

"Yes of course. You said she is a Jane Doe, has nobody claimed her?"

 _"No, it's rather horrible really. She has no family or friends or anyone really as they clearly would have come looking for her, but we want the best for her"_

"Of course, thank you for your call. Tell your doctors that once she is set up to get a nurse to page me to her room"

 _"Thank you Dr Shepherd"_ He hung up, Cristina meeting him at the end of the hall.

"What do we have?"

"A Jane Doe is being from transferred from Mercy West. She was in a car accident and they can't support her anymore so we are going to see what we can do to help. She is currently in a coma"

"Coma? How long have they had her?"

"11 days" Cristina raised her eyebrows, cringing slightly.

"That is a long time to go unrecognised. Do you think she has no family?"

"Well, we will try our best to get her awake and hopefully find her family. Whether she is going to make it or not, everyone deserves someone with them"

"Speaking of, have you heard from her?"

"No, Chief has been calling all hospitals he can think of to see if he can locate her but so far nothing"

"I was so horrible to her the last time I saw her, both me and George were. And she had a huge argument with Izzie and obviously the blow out with your ex wife- I think she was pushed too far" Derek frowned, not having heard what went down between her and Addison.

"Wait? What happened between her and Addison?"

"You divorced her and Addison thought it was all Mere's fault. The nurses told me she told her she destroys everything in her path. Kinda harsh really, but we all were" Derek had no idea of the fallout and was gobsmacked, wondering if all the interactions she endured had sent her away. They managed all Derek's rounds, his pager informing him of the room where their Jane Doe had arrived.

"I think we should all sit down and figure out a plan to find her" Derek said, Cristina nodding.

"I agree"

"For now, let's try and wake this patient up and we will sort it out later" They entered the room, the two freezing in the doorway, Cristina's eyes wide.

"Oh my God"

"Its-"

"Derek, that's Meredith. The Jane Doe is Meredith!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay so I have had some concerns about this story not being able to be fit into 2/3 chapters so if need be, I will extend this story it just depends on how much I want to bring into it. Saying that, thank you all for your encouraging messages, I am glad you like the plot line and hope that this continuation does not disappoint.**

 **Okay so on with the show!**

Derek, Cristina, Alex, George, Bailey and Richard stood around Meredith's hospital bed, nobody willing to speak a word as they stood in silence, the only sound filling the room being the steady beeping of her heart monitor.

"What are her injuries?" George finally asked, Cristina slowly opening the chart that had been filled out for her, her voice dry and full of emotion.

"She has a large brain bleed that needs to be controlled, spinal damage, nerve damage in her right hand, a broken leg and multiple internal bleeds that were fixed but it seems her spline keeps re-bleeding and they were going to remove it"

"How did we miss this?" He asked, nobody knowing the answer.

"I knew we should have called the police. I told you and nobody listened" Alex complained, knowing that from the beginning he was the one worried but at first nobody had listened. It even took Cristina and George a week to start worrying slightly.

"I need to operate on the brain bleed, and I can also try and fix her nerves in her arm" Derek stated. Bailey standing forward also.

"I need to get her spline bleeding under control" She said, Richard nodding.

"Can you fix her nerves?" He asked, Derek understand the meaning.

"I need to get in there to see but, I can't promise anything"

"If she can't operate again that will be the end of her. You don't understand how much it means to her" Cristina said harshly, knowing that if her friend couldn't operate anymore she might as well have been killed in the accident.

"I know that, which is why I want you in with me, helping me preserve as many nerves as we can" She nodded, Bailey looking to George.

"I want you in to help me" He nodded, Alex standing back with Richard.

"We need to tell Izzie" Cristina scoffed, looking at him with narrow eyes.

"Izzie hasn't battered an eyelash in 11 days. Does she have the right?" She was right, Izzie was being harsh about it and certainly showed her dark side over the past week.

"She has as much of a right as all of us" Bailey said, knowing that as much as it wasn't her finest week, she was still Meredith's friend until she physically proved otherwise. A;ex paged her, waiting outside the room with everyone besides Cristina and Derek, the two staring at Meredith.

"We are terrible people. We are supposed to be _her_ people and we never even thought to look for her" Derek said, Cristina sighing heavily.

"How could we have let this happen? She was too scared to go home that night and she should have come to me but I just blew up on her. She had nowhere to go"

"You know, when we had the rapist victim in last year, she was all alone and Meredith kept coming to check on her. She told me she understood the feeling, of being alone if something happened to her, and I told her she would never be alone. And then, she wakes up yesterday in some strange hospital and gets told that they don't know who she is or who her family is- it must have ruined her"

"Nobody should ever be alone like that- especially not her" He nodded, knowing that she had been through so much and this was just not what she deserved. They went outside with everyone else, Derek spotting Izzie coming up the corridor. She frowned when she saw everyone gathered around waiting for her, approaching them with caution.

"What's going on?" She laughed slightly, Bailey stepping forward, taking charge of the woman.

"We found Meredith" She said slowly, Izzie crossing her arms across her chest in annoyance.

"Okay- where was she?"

"She was at Mercy West"

"I thought Chief had called Mercy West and they said she never came to them" Derek perked up slightly, Izzie clearly showing that she had been listening in.

"She wasn't their working" Izzie's face dropped, shaking her head slightly.

"She was a patient? I don't believe you" Everyone went silent, Izzie pushing past them to get inside the room, her face paling as she took in Meredith's condition. Her pale skin was still covered in multiple bruises and cuts, her face over taken by the breathing tube, her chest moving up and down in sync with the machine.

"What happened to her?" Izzie turned to everyone, demanding information.

"She was in a car crash the night she left the hospital- she has been in a coma since then but woke up briefly yesterday. She worked herself up so they had to sedate her, she hasn't work since" Izzie shook her head, putting at her recklessly.

"This is my fault- we had a fight and she left and she was so upset and then I never even bothered to help look for her"

"We all played part in her leaving Izz" Alex jumped in, though he never did anything personally they were all to blame.

"No you don't understand. I told her she betrayed me and I- called her a whore" She cried, her breathing erratic, Cristina going to her side to calm her down.

"Izzie working yourself up about it now isn't going to help her. We need to get her better okay?" She nodded, a tear rolling down her cheek as she looked back at her broken friend. They all began to busy themselves with prepping her for surgery, Derek bumping into Addison on his way to the scrub room.

"Is it true Derek? Is she in a coma?" Derek turned to her, his face red with emotion as he cornered her.

"What did you say to her that night? WHat did you say that could have ran her out like that?" Addison gulped, knowing that on the night she left she had been unreasonable and distraught and took everything out on Meredith.

"I told her that kissing my ass wouldn't make me hate her less and that she should be satisfied with herself because she was out to get me and she won. That she- I told her she destroyed everything in it's path and she only cared about the outcome for her sake" Addison managed to get out, clearly knowing she never meant any of it, but it seems Meredith took it to heart, which she had every right to do.

"How dare you! I told you that Meredith wasn't the only reason for me wanting a divorce and still you blow up on her! You know- after the first few days of our divorce you handled it so well and I respected you for that, but now? All that respect was wasted. You were the last person to see her that night- you were the last person she confided in and whether everyone else payed part, you are the reason she is in that hospital bed. You did this Addison" He spat angrily, storming past her, leaving her broken in the middle of the hallway. She dropped her head, heading up to the gallery, wanting to see the extent of her injuries first hand. She had to make it, otherwise nobody would come back from it. This was it, this was the fate of all their lives.

"You have to make it Meredith"

 **Okay so this chapter is kinda small but I am trying to upload a chapter for everything in one go. I kinda have another story in mind but I want to finish at least one of my three up right now before attempting to publish it. But until then, I hope you enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay so, a lot of people are loving this story right now, which is great, so, I am going to extend the chapters so this will probably have about 6 or 7 or maybe more depending on how I go.**

 **So, enough rambling, on with the show! Don't forget to review!**

Izzie had been kicked up to the the gallery with Alex, them both going up the stairs, bumping into Addison who was staring down at the OR in thought.

"This isn't just your fault" Izzie said to her, breaking her from her haze.

"Derek thinks otherwise" She replied shortly, taking a seat next to the blonde, Alex staying standing.

"We all did something" Alex reminded them, Izzie looking up at him, shocked at how broken he looked.

"What did you do?"

"I never looked hard enough for her" He sighed, leaving the gallery, needing to do something productive to distract himself while she was in surgery.

"I've never seen him like that" Izzie said as she watched him leave, Addison knowing he had a past of being a douche.

"I think he is troubled by the fact he was the only person not mad at her that night and she left the hospital instead of confining in him" They fell into an awkward silence as the surgery went underway. Addison could see the internal battle within Derek as he tried to stay professional, though deep down he wanted to break down at the thought of having his hands inside her brain.

"The brain bleed is under control" He announced, Cristina sighing heavily as they began to close up her head, now needing to figure out a plan for the nerves in her hand.

"Someone page Karev, I need him to watch for a re-bleed while I work on her arm" Chief paged for him, him arriving not 2 minutes later.

"Is she okay?" He managed to get out, his shoulders relaxing slightly when he saw the steady beating of her heart.

"I need you to watch for a re-bleed while we work on her nerves" He nodded, scrubbing in, taking a seat at her head. An hour went by, nobody daring to speak, Alex taking turns to stare at Meredith and her vitals.

"I have successfully removed her spline" Bailey said as George took it away for disposal, Bailey beginning to suture her up. Suddenly, Meredith's heart rate plummeted, Alex jumping up.

"What happened?"

"She is seizing!" The doctors ran around recklessly, trying to stop her seizing, them all freezing when the deafening sound of a flat line echoed around the room.

"Charge to 200!" Bailey shouted, them all stepping back as her body was rocketed off the table, slamming back down again. Nothing.

"Damnit, charge to 250" Again, they watched in agony as her body was shocked, Bailey sighing when the steady beating of her heart started up again.

"She is back, how far do you have with the nerves Derek?" Richard asked, knowing that the only possible reason for her seizing is due to the stress all the surgeries are having on her body, and they needed to get her off and back in recovery as soon as possible.

"About another 30 minutes" He replied bluntly, trying to mask his emotions as he and Cristina carried on working. Once he was sure that the nerves were fixed to the best of his ability, he started to close up, everyone starting to scrub out.

"Do you think she will have full ability" Cristina asked, Derek sighing heavily.

"I can't know until I run tests. I will do them when she is back in recovery, but I am hopeful" He replied, the woman nodding. ONce she was being taken back to recover, Derek ran to the nearest toilet, not being able to help as he threw up the remains of his stomach contents, not hearing the door open. Once he was sure he wouldn't throw up again, he opened the door and jumped when he saw Richard outside the cubicle, not looking him in the eye as he went to the sink to rinse his mouth.

"You shouldn't have been in that OR" He said bluntly, Derek rolling his eyes.

"None of us should have operated on her, you know we are all too attached to her, but that never stopped Bailey operating on her, or George or Cristina, or you being in there for that matter. None of us should have been in there, yet, she is on her way to recovery alive" He snapped back tiredly, not caring that it was his chief he was snapping at.

"We never looked harder for her" He said after a few seconds, Derek nodding.

"No, we didn't. When she woke up, she was told they didn't know her identity and that nobody had bothered looking far for her so nobody had claimed her yet. She woke up abandoned, and that is all of our fault" Derek shouted angrily, leaning against the sink, closing his eyes over.

"Who are you more angry at? Me or yourself?"

"I am angry at Addison, and Izzie, and Cristina and George and you and Bailey and me and Alex, I am angry at everyone because she, she told me. She told me she would be alone if something ever happened to her and I told her she didn't need to worry about being alone and we ruined that for her. She is so broken, and this, I don't know if she will be able to come back from this"

"We are here now, she will understand that" Derek turned to look at him, his face haunted by the image of her body lying unconscious like that.

"So, you think that if her father come back into her life now she would take him back? You think if her mother became lucid she would be all hole and healed? You know that for someone like Meredith it takes a lot more than that" He sighed heavily, knowing Derek was right.

"Come on, she could wake up any minute" He said, taking his friends arm and leading him out the room.

 **So, if you haven't already don't forget to check out the latest chapter for 3 years and Beaten and Broken! They haven't had many reviews yet which is concerning...**

 **Also, the next chapter or two is going to be in Mere's POV, just as a pre-warning. And they are also going to flash back slightly to the accident etc but you will see when I upload next.**

 **Don't forget to review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**This chapter is slightly small and is all in Mere's point of view but it kinda fills in the gap that we missed while she was at Mercy West.**

 **So, when Meredith woke up alone, it was significant because of the date which I have mentioned in this chapter. I want to see if anyone can guess why she got so upset about the date... Drop your guess in the reviews and I will shoutout those who get it right in the next chapter!**

I stormed out of the hospital into the parking lot, the rain heavenly on my burning skin. I didn't care that I was getting soaked as I headed to my car, allowing the rain to soak through my scrubs, dampen my hair. I slumped into my car seat, driving aimlessly, not sure where I was actually heading. I wasn't going home, I wasn't going anywhere. I couldn't help but cringe as the rain got heavier on the windscreen, the wipers making no difference as the window got more and more blurred. I knew I had to pull over until it passed so without hesitation, I pulled off to the side. I never saw the other car skid across the road. I never heard the tires over the heavy rain on the roof. I only spotted the headlights as they came right at the drivers side window. I barely managed to stay conscious as the car flipped, but then, it all went black.

* * *

I woke again on a gurney. My entire body hurt and I felt a numbness in my right hand and left leg, not knowing if it was from the rain and cold or if I had serious damage. A ringing deafened me in my right ear, the other vibrating around a very muffled voice.

 _"Ma'am, you were in a car accident but we are taking you to Mercy West and we are going to take good care of you"_ **No, you have to take me to Seattle Grace. Seattle Grace is my home**. But of course, they couldn't hear me. Something was definitely wrong. Faces of doctors I had never seen before took over my vision, their voices muffling into one. It went black once again after that.

* * *

It seemed like forever till I woke again. I could feel my left leg now finally, but my right hand was just a blur of tingling. **Like pins and needles.** Ah, that was another thing. I still couldn't talk. That was when I felt the incubation tube in my mouth. It was large and I could feel it breathing for me, which clearly showed my lungs weren't doing that simple job for me. **Great.** I slowly tried to pry my eyes open, slamming them back shut when I heard a voice. A voice I had never heard before.

 _"Ma'am, can you open your eyes for me. You are doing really well_ " **Ma'am? My name is Meredith you idiot. Call me by my name!** I opened my eyes slowly, first taking in the ceiling which had dimmed lights hanging from it. Then I moved my eyes to the walls. That was when things lost me. **Why am I not at Seattle Grace? Surely they should have transported me**. My eyes finally landed on the doctor. His scrubs were a totally different colour to what I was used to and I had never seen his face before in my life. That was when I started to panic.

 _"Ma'am, I need you to calm down for me. You are in Mercy West hospital. You were in a car accident and have a lot of injuries. It is November 10th 2006, nobody has claimed you yet but we are still looking, you need to try and calm down"_ **Nobody has claimed me? But, where is Cristina? Where is Bailey? Where is Derek? He told me I would never be alone, and, he promised I wouldn't be alone**. I could hear the rapid beeping of my machine as I tried my hardest to talk, the doctor going out of my eyesight. **No come back, please I am all alone please come back.**

 _"She is going into distress. We are going to have to sedate her again"_ **No! Don't sedate me please! Please I am alone and I have nobody. Please.** Then everything faded into a blur, the world going black again.

* * *

 **Bright lights. Why is the lights so bright this time! Lower the damn lights!**

 _"Her hand twitched? Did you see her hand twitch?"_ **Wait? Was that- George?** I tried my hardest to pry my eyes open, sighing internally when the lights were dimmed.

 _"Meredith? Meredith can you hear me? Wiggle your fingers if you can hear me?"_ **That was Cristina! That was most definitely Cristina.** I slowly managed to wiggle my fingers, hearing the tapping on something, probably someone's arm.

 _"You saw that! She is waking up! Finally she is waking up"_ **Finally? How long have I been out?** I managed to get one eye open, the first face I spotted being George's, a huge grin on his face. As I moved my eyes around I saw Cristina, then Richard and then Bailey. I felt my breathing being forced upon me, realising I still had the incubation tube in, but clearly my lungs were fighting it. I saw Richard notice my heart rate change, his hand resting on mine.

 _"We will remove the tube okay? On three, one, two, three"_ I felt a burning sensation in the back of my throat as they pulled the tube out, coughing uncontrollably.

 _"Here, it's okay. Take deep breaths"_ Derek? Where did he come from? He held a cup to my mouth, the water soothing as it travelled down my throat. I sighed in content, resting my head back more, closing my eyes slightly. The world was finally moving at normal speed again, I felt in sync with the world once more.

"Meredith? Can you try and talk for me?" Bailey asked, my eyes opening slowly again. **Can I talk? I couldn't talk last time I tried**.

"Try and say my name, really easy okay? Bailey" She mouthed, my head nodding slightly.

"B-Bailey" It was hoarse and dry, but it was there. I smiled slightly to myself, mumbling her name over and over again.

"That is really good Mere, that means the brain surgery was a success" George said with a smile, a frown spreading across my face.

"Surgery?" Richard nodded, slowly taking his hand off mine.

"You had a few surgeries but for the past 3 days you have been here, no more surgeries have been needed" He explained, my head nodding along as he spoke. I looked down and saw my hand in a cast, my eyes wide slightly.

"My hand" I mumbled, trying to close it, the action happening a few seconds later, worrying me.

"You had a lot of nerve damage but with a lot of physiotherapy you will have up to 90% function again"

"I can't operate with 90%" I whispered, tears brimming in my eyes, Bailey shaking her head.

"Yes you can, it will take a while to get back to it but you will be fine! You will be able to operate in no time" I nodded slowly, looking up at Derek who was staring at me. Memories flashed back to that other hospital, to being alone. My body tensed slightly, everyone noticing.

"I'd like to be alone please" I said slowly, Cristina moving closer to me.

"Mere-" I shook my head, looking away from everyone.

"Please" My voice shook, everyone slowly backing out of the room. I looked up, Derek being the last to leave, his eyes begging me to call him back in but I just looked away, staring blankly at the floor.

 **"They left me alone"**


	5. Chapter 5

**Shout out** **to** unnamedconspirator **for guessing the date right! It is in fact Ellen's birthday and so I am making it Meredith's birthday (due to the fact it isn't mentioned on the show, I don't think) You guys should totally go and check out their stories, their oneshot 'Knitting' is one of my favourites to read, it makes me howl every time!**

 **Okay so, this is going to start the recovery period for Meredith and her trying to deal with everyone wanting to apologise. I know she may seem really harsh, but she has every right to be hurt- I am writing her feelings and emotions based on personal experiences because I personally know how it feels for your close friends to not take notice of you when you are struggling and not bother to contact you and see if you are okay,and trust me, it is not the best feeling in the world. So I am sympathising with Meredith in this case and I hope you all do as well!**

 **Also, this chapter is purely Merlex friendship because their friendship is adorable!**

 **Don't forget to review guys.**

Meredith painfully tried to move her thumb to each of her fingers on her bad hand, her impatience growing as it took a while for her thumb to move on her demand.

"Come one" She whispered to herself, her hand shaking painfully as she tried to get her thumb to her last two fingers. When the act never occurred, she groaned loudly and thrusted her head back into her pillow, closing her eyes over.

"Damnit" she ran her other hand through her hair, wincing as the scar on her head was still fresh. It had been just over a day since she had woke and already she was sick of being stuck in the hospital with everyone watching over her. She was supposed to stay for another 4 weeks but she knew that once she was healed properly she could leave early, nobody could stop her. She opened her eyes when she heard people entering the room, rolling her eyes when she knew Derek was taking the other interns on their rounds, and due to his surgery being the most extensive on her, she was technically his patient.

"O'Malley, present" She watched George step forward, everyone staring at her but she ket her cold gaze fixated on George who was awfully uncomfortable under her watch.

"Patient Meredith Grey, 4 day post-head operation after being in a coma for 11 days and transferring from Mercy West. Her hand has yet to gain the 70% mobility we are waiting on despite the training she has been doing so it it gets to a week and the mobility is still weak we are going to take her back in for another operation to try and restore some more of the nerves" He stepped back, Cristina being next to present, though Meredith had yet to make eye contact with her supposed best friend.

"4 day post-splenectomy, wound is healing nicely and there have been no further complications due to this" She stepped back, Meredith having gone to staring at the floor, not willing to make eye contact with anyone else.

"How is the pain today?" Derek asked, Meredith trying to stop her eyes rolling as she leaned back further.

"7" She muttered, Derek marking it down on her chart.

"O'Malley, Karev, sort out Meredith's pain medication. I will be back in an hour to take you for another CT" Meredith never answered him but watched as they all left, her eyes landing on Alex and George who were standing in the corner, afraid to approach her.

"I'll be right now" ALex whispered, leaving the room, George trying to stop him, Meredith raising her eyebrows at him. He smiled slightly at her, approaching her good arm slowly.

"What hurts today?" He asked slowly, Meredith staring at her hand.

"My head and arm" She told him bluntly, George wanting to check her head for any swelling but everything seemed to be healing fine.

"It's going to take longer for your head to heal due to the extent of the bleed" He stated, Meredith rolling her eyes.

"I am a doctor as well George" She said, closing her eyes as he fixed her IV up to more pain medication.

"You called me O'Malley yesterday" He whispered, Meredith opening one of her eyes to stare at him.

"What?"

"You called me O'Malley yesterday, not George"

"Would you prefer me to call you O'Malley. I know you wouldn't want to breach the line of patient care" She said with a straight face, George looking at her with sad eyes.

"You're my friend Meredith, you aren't just a patient" She looked away from him, his hands dropping to his side.

"We had no way of knowing what had happened to you Meredith?"

"You had a way of stopping me. I was scared to go home because you looked at me like I was a burden and Izzie called me a whore and, you could have stopped it but you never. And I woke up alone. So, nobody has the right to feel mistreated except for me. Now, if you are done I'd like you to leave" George nodded his head, fixing the IV before slowly leaving the room, not noticing Alex heading back towards it. Meredith felt another presence at her bed and looked up, shaking her head when she saw Alex.

"Leave me alone, George already did the IV" She expected him to walk out but instead he came closer to her, holding out a letter. She frowned, taking it with her good hand, looking at the name on the front.

"This is addressed to you, why are you giving it to me?"

"I promised you I would open my results with you when I got them, and I never break a promise" She felt her eyes light up slightly, feeling the unbroken seal with her thumb.

"You really never opened it?"

"I called your cell every day, even at the hope I could open them and read it down the phone to you. So, until I got hold of you, I kept it at the back of my locker. I was going to give it to you yesterday but, I was kinda scared you would hit me with something, but, I am not going to let you be like this with me, because, I looked for you, and I know that waking up alone was not fair, I know Meredith. So, can you push back your bitchnyness for like, 5 minutes and open my letter" She smiled, nodding her head. She went to open it, Alex snatching it back again.

"I want you to try and open it with your other hand" She cringed, watching as he placed it in her limp hand.

"Just, close your hand over enough to hold it and rip it with your other hand" She nodded, slowly, neither of them noticing Cristina and Derek in the doorway, and neither of them noticing Izzie in the background. Meredith focused on closing her hand over on the letter, her face strained as her fingers slowly began to close over, Alex grinning as they finally gripped the letter.

"That's really great Mere, try and hold the grip while you rip it" She nodded, a smile on her face as she started ripping the envelope open, laughing happily when it opened fully, her hand still gripping it.

"I did it" She whispered, looking up happily at Alex.

"Try and keep hold of it while you pull the letter out" He pushed her, Meredith managing to do just that, letting go once she had the letter out. Alex sat down on the edge of the bed, crossing his legs stupidly.

"Present with me the news" He said making Meredith laugh, clearing her throat as she started reading.

"Dear Alexander Michael Karev-" She had to pause as she laughed, Alex rolling his eyes.

"Keep reading Grey" She nodded, stifling her laugh as she continued.

"Okay sorry, Dear Alexander Michael Karev, I am pleased to say that you have completed your board exam and will be able to continue your internship at Seattle Grace Hospital. Congratulations and us at the board wish you all the luck in your internship and with your intern exam in just under 2 years time- Alex, you passed!" Alex grinned widely at her little cheer, Meredith's face lighting up like he hadn't seen in a while.

"They wished me luck in my intern exam, is that some joke?" He laughed, Meredith smacking his arm.

"This is amazing, you're going to make an amazing surgeon Alex" She commented sincerely, Alex frowning.

"So are you" She rolled her eyes, a sad smile on her face suddenly.

"It took me about 3 minutes to open a letter Alex, I am not going to have the hands I had 2 weeks ago"

"If you think like that, no you won't. You believed in me when I never, so now it is my turn to believe in you when you don't, even if you don't want me to"

"I'm sorry I scared you yesterday" She mumbled, Alex laughing.

"I'm sorry for not finding you sooner" He replied, Meredith smiling. Derek and Cristina backed off slightly, knowing it was rude of them to listen in so it had to stop.

"He understood, he understood what if felt like for her to wake up alone, are we missing something?" Cristina complained, running her hand down her face.

"It was her birthday" Izzie stated solemnly, Derek turning to look at her in shock.

"What?"

"November 10th, it's her birthday. She woke up on her birthday and we weren't there" The information dawned on Derek and Cristina, memories rushing into his mind.

"I told her I would take her away, I was going to book us a 3 day trip to San Francisco, and then everything happened with Addison and I, I forgot" He whispered, Cristina remembering Meredith telling her, Izzie, George and Alex not long after Derek had broken up with her.

"How could we not remember?"

"Because we are terrible people, we are really bad people" Izzie whispered, them all not moving as they stared at he room, wondering how they could have gone so wrong.


	6. Chapter 6

Meredith sighed heavily as Derek entered her room, not making eye contact with her as he noted something down on her chart. She watched him walk around her room, frowning when he never bothered to interact or even make eye contact with her. It was coming up to her being awake for a week and the only person who was making amends was Alex, while everyone else seemed to grow further away from her, unlike their usual behaviour. She had woken up one morning to cards and flowers around her room, noticing how Derek's card was covered in pictures of San Francisco. She had wondered if that meant her remembered, but besides rounds he never spoke more than 2 words when around her. She was gaining more function in her hand so she didn't need more surgery but, that doesn't mean he should ignore her. She watched him fix up her central line and her IV, his eyes flickering up to her face slightly, his face contorting in pain when he noticed her looking at him.

"How is my chart?" She finally asked him, his face going numb making her frown even further.

"It's looking great, you'll be out of her in no time Dr Grey" He said with a strained smile, not giving her a chance to speak before walking out the room, leaving her alone. She leaned back on her bed, wondering if everyone had given up on her. George could barely look her in the eye when doing rounds, and Cristina stayed at the back of the room. Izzie never even entered the room and would hang around outside by the nurses station with Bailey who was also badly avoiding her. The only person who held a conversation with her longer than 2 minutes was Richard and Alex. She smiled when Alex walked in the room, but he kept looking behind himself making her frown.

"What's up?"

"George just ran away from me- like, literally ran away from me" He frowned, Meredith groaning openly.

"Okay, whats up with you?"

"I know I am being a bitch, but nobody wants to speak to me anymore. And, the effort was kinda comforting" She mumbled annoyingly to him, him raising his eyebrows at her.

"Nobody has spoken to you? In how long?"

"They have been getting more distant over the week. Like, I thought they would have tried. I just want to leave now"

"Well they won't release you early if you have nobody to look after you and no offence but your roommates aren't talking to you" She groaned, running her hand down her face annoyingly.

"I might ask them to transfer me to another hospital? Can they do that?" Alex shook his head straight away, Meredith frowning.

"You are not leaving again Mere"

"Well what the hell am I supposed to do Alex? My doctors won't speak to me and I can't leave!" She shouted angrily, Alex sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Come and stay at my apartment with me" He said bluntly, Meredith raising her eyebrows at him.

"Really? You would do that?"

"Of course I would Mere. I can extend my contract with the owner and I think you can be out of here in two days giving me time to clear the spare room for you. And when you have physio you can come to work with me as normal- saves you being stuck here with them all. To be honest Mere, if they are going to be like with you are they really worth the effort on your end?" She nodded her head, Alex smiling as he stood.

"I have a surgery with Bailey, but I will breach the subject with her and then you can breach it with chief and we will get you home" She nodded with a smile, watching as he left. Not long after, Richard came to visit her, a smile on his face.

"Just the man I was looking for!" Meredith expressed happily, Richard frowning.

"Really?" She nodded, motioning for him to sit down.

"When can I leave?" She asked, him shaking his head.

"Meredith, you know the rules on leaving against medical advice"

"I do. If you leave against medical advice you need someone to be at home with you, weekly visits with your doctor and to attend all necessary appointments. I will be living with Alex who is a doctor anyway, I will come in and see you all once a week and also attend my physio appointments" She told him, Richard cringing slightly. She sighed, looking him dead in the eye, her eyes tired and done.

"Listen, nobody speaks more than 2 words to me anymore. Derek can't look me in the eye and nobody wants to make an effort with me. I was left alone, and I thought everyone would be fighting to make amends, but nobody has bothered to even try. Being in here, with everyone staring at me, it pains me chief" She admitted with teary eyes, Richard taking her hand in his. He was about to object again but the pain in her eyes was too much for him to bare.

"I'll get the forms for you. You will be out tomorrow night" She wrapped her arms around him, Richard staring at her hand mostly than engaging in the hug.

"You closed your hand" He whispered, Meredith nodding.

"I have been practicing. My physiotherapist is impressed with my nerves development and said I could be back to at least 90% by the end of the month" Richard laughed, glad to see that things were looking up for her.

"I will be back later to discuss things with you and Karev okay?" She nodded, sighing heavily as she watched him leave. Things would be okay, they had to be. Alex was right, why should she put in the effort when none of them were battering an eyelash. The hours went by pretty quickly, Alex being back in her room discussing his surgery, Meredith having withdrawal from the OR.

"I would kill to cut someone open" She said annoyed, Alex leaning back in his chair.

"Don't be taking that out on me" She let out a loud laugh, Alex following. They never noticed the others hanging around by the nurses station, listening to them laughing.

"Is she even bothered that we aren't in her life?" Izzie asked slightly bitter, Derek sighing heavily, leaning against the side. They watched as Richard and Bailey entered her room, not being able to hear the conversation that went quiet between the four.

"You are sure?" Bailey asked her, Meredith nodding as she signed the papers.

"I can't sit here watching them Bailey. I need to get out" She admitted, Bailey nodding, rubbing her hand.

"I want to personally apologise for, I want to say sorry for treating you the way I did. I know you were doing what was best for the patient and it was out of line for me to shout at you the way I did" She smiled, nodding her head.

"Thank you Bailey" She took the paper work off her, looking over at chief who was going to explain her limits.

"You are on bed rest for at least 2 weeks, except for when you come for check ups and for physio. Karev, you have a week leave- paid- to settle her in. When you bring her to the hospital she needs to be in a wheelchair. If you as much as feel any pain that you shouldn't I want you to get Karev to page us straight away. Just because we are giving you a boot for your leg does not mean you can walk miles. It is for the minimum usage"

"And after 2 months we are going to discuss work. Only after 2 months" She nodded at the conditions, Alex taking note on a piece of paper to show he was most definitely in for this.

"When can I take her home?" Alex asked, Meredith smiling at him, his consideration more than she could ever ask for.

"Tomorrow night. I understand you want to make things presentable" Bailey smiled, Alex nodding, getting ready to head home to make sure the pare bedroom is set up for her.

"I will be back in the morning" He said, Meredith nodding as he left, Alex giving the others a look as he hurriedly left the room.

"I have a meeting but I will be here tomorrow" Richard left, Bailey sitting on the edge of the bed with a small smile.

"Have they spoke to you yet?" She asked, Meredith shaking her head.

"Being here pains me Bailey" She whispered, Bailey sighing.

"You aren;t finishing your internship here are you?"

"I wasn't going to breach the subject with Chief until later on. I don't want to leave, but, it is really clear they have lost all sense on caring. I mean, look at the way Alex is acting. I should be able to go to my own house, but I am too scared to even look at them because I feel like its a burden on them" Bailey nodded, knowing it wasn't fair that she was feeling that way.

"Karev is certainly taking you under his wing" Bailey winked, Meredith cringing slightly.

"Do not put that image in my head while I am preparing to move into his apartment" She laughed, though Bailey knew the undermining meaning. _I still love Derek._

"I get it" She said, standing.

"I will be here tomorrow to discharge you okay?" She shouted to her as she left the room, Meredith grinning as she leant back, closing her eyes over. Everything would be fine. She jumped at the angry tone that echoed around her room, her eyes flying open, landing on the figure in the door.

"You're being discharged?!"

 **I wonder who is angry at the fact she is leaving... Don't forget to review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay so I gotta apologise for being MIA this past week. I had results day on Thursday which did not really go that great ( I got a D and an E but got two A's so it balances out ) and my friend who stayed over also never did that great ( She got 2 D's and 2 C's ). Then the day after ( Friday ) we went to a festival for the entire weekend and never got home until 3pm yesterday ( Monday ). The festival was amazing, we saw so many amazing people live and had a blast, though the fact we had to camp was not so fun ( We woke up one night to a huge beetle in the middle of our blow up bed and ended up standing outside for an hour because we were too scared to go back into the tent ).**

 **Anyway, enough about that, on with the story. As we know, Meredith is being discharged and the last time we were here, someone was not all that happy about it. This continues straight after the end of the last chapter.**

 **Don't forget to review!**

Izzie stood in the doorway to Meredith's room, her face expressing a shocked look as the others slowly come up behind her, Meredith staring at her with wide eyes.

"Yes I am, why?"

"You woke up from a coma not even a week ago and they are discharging you? You really have them wrapped around your finger don't you?" She snapped harshly, Meredith frowning.

"I am being discharged against medical advice, it took a lot of persuading" She replied bluntly, trying to push back her emotions as the others stared at her.

"And you pass all the criteria?"

"I'm staying at Alex's apartment and he is going to bring me in for Physio and my appointments" She saw the insulted look cross Izzie's face, wondering what could have annoyed her so much about that.

"What about your house? Where we stay?" George perked up from in the corner, Meredith's eyes flickering in his direction, though he couldn't hold eye contact. Meredith didn't get a chance to talk before Izzie spoke up again, her voice full of disgust.

"Clearly she doesn't want to stay at home anymore" She stormed away, George scurrying off after her leaving Cristina and Derek in the doorway.

"Did you even ask them if you could go home?" Cristina asked, slight disappointment in her voice shocking Meredith.

"You think they gave me the chance?" Meredith shouted causing Cristina to jump back, crossing her arms across her chest before storming off in the same direction Izzie and George went. Meredith looked at Derek now who was still looking at her, his eyes soft, full of sadness.

"Go on, say what you have to say" Meredith's tone made Derek think before he spoke, but he just shook his head and walked away, Meredith's jaw dropping slightly as a tear rolled down her cheek. She could see everyone from outside the room staring at her through the window, her head turning away as more tears consumed her, her sobs silent as she buried her head into the pillow.

 _The next day_

Alex paced Meredith's room as he waited for Bailey to bring her back from the bathroom where she was helping her get changed. He felt a smile spread across his face when they come around the corner, Meredith not looking too happy about being in a wheelchair.

"Ready?" She nodded her head slowly, Bailey ushering chief to take the wheelchair.

"I'll take you to the car while Alex and Bailey get your medication" Meredith merely nodded as he wheeled her off, Alex frowning at Bailey who picked up Meredith's go bag, ushering him to follow her to the pharmacy to pick up her prescriptions.

"The entire hospital is talking about her. The others were't too happy about her being discharged and took it out on her last night" Alex's face dropped, his eyes filling with anger.

"What the hell did they do?"

"They were angry overall that she was being discharged and the fact she never asked them to go home. Apparently McBastard let her take it all and never helped. Even Yang had something to say"

"I can't believe them. After everything she has been through and they are blaming her" He shouted angrily, turning as if he was going to storm and find them, Bailey taking his arm.

"She want's to leave Seattle Grace Karev, when she is better. She doesn't want to finish her internship here, and I don't think she should either. She deserves better"

"We just got her back"

"I know, and I am very impressed with how you have handled this, so I want to trust that you will help her when she is back on her feet" Alex sighed, nodding his head. They got the medication and headed to the car, Meredith sitting in the passengers seat, her head buried in her hands. Richard nodded in the direction of the doorway, Alex and Bailey spotting Izzie, George, Cristina, Derek and Addison in a group, neither of them looking their direction. Alex felt his blood boil as he threw the bag he had at Richard, heading in their direction, ignore Bailey's protests. He heard their conversation die down when they spotted her approaching, Alex stopping short in front of them all.

"What the hell is the matter with all of you? She went missing, and nobody was bothered, and the fact you have all stopped caring now that she is back is heartless and you don't deserve her consideration. I hope you are all satisfied with yourself" His voice broke slightly, his eyes flickering to Derek who he looked up and down.

"You told me you loved her. You cried to me that you loved her and chose wrong and now you are doing it again, throwing it all away again. And any respect I had left for you has gone, for all of you" He shared a look with Addison before staring at his fellow interns, turning on his heel to walk back to the car. Before he made it all the way, he turned back one final time, his hands shaking as he shouted.

"She was always good to every single one of you, and if this is how you are truly going to treat her I don't want anything to do with any of you" He felt slightly satisfied with himself as he headed to the drivers side, Meredith shocked with how he had stood up for her.

"Thank you" She whispered, Alex nodding, Bailey and Richard saying their goodbyes as they drove off.


	8. Chapter 8

**I am starting to really enjoy updating my stories, I just have so many plans it is making updating all that much more fun!**

 **Okay so, Alex has taken Mere under his wing and in this chapter it is really showing how dedicated to her he is being. But, to comfort everyone, this is not a Merlex fanfiction, everything is pure friendship because as I said, I adore their friendship because they really have done a lot for each other and I think it is really underestimated on the show, but season 11 and 12 really brought it out making me extremely happy!  
**

 **Off topic for a second, who is excited for season 13?! I am on the edge of my toes waiting for it! I cannot wait for it to start up again- I know I have been re-watching them all but I am just so excited for the story lines.**

 **Last night I reached the end of season 8 and sat alone at 1am watching ice cream sobbing because… RIP Slexie :'( The plane Crash ruins me every single time.**

 **ANYWAY on with the show and don't forget to review!**

Alex helped Meredith on her crutches into his apartment, Meredith actually shocked with how clean it was, thought she doubted it looked like that yesterday. She felt her nose tingle as a strong smell of vanilla took over her senses. She barely registered Alex as he spoke to her, her eyes closing over slightly in content.

"Okay so this is the living area, I know its a lot smaller than your moms house and the kitchen it practically the same room but you have your own bedroom which is next to mine. I only have one bathroom but I got someone to come out real quick last night and they installed a lock so if you are in there I won't bother you at all" He turned around to face her, frowning when she still had her eyes closed.

"Mere?" He tapped her shoulder, her opening her eyes to his concerned gaze. She smiled at him, feeling tears in her eyes.

"I love the smell of vanilla" She whispered, Alex sending her his sideways smile he only does rarely.

"I know, you told me when you were helping me study. I remembered so I thought it would homely for you" She sniffed and looked down, laughing slightly.

"I feel really bad for calling you a douche when we first met" He laughed at her, continuing to help her down onto the couch.

"Well I thought you had only got into the program because of your mom so technically, I was a douche" He sat next to her, watching as she rested her head back, sighing in content.

"It feels good to be out of that hospital. Away from everything" She admitted to him after a few moments of silence, him wrapping his arm around her shoulders for her to rest on him.

"I know, but it's all going to be okay because you are going to recover and we are going to get you back on your feet and it'll be you and me, the two musketeers!" He expressed as enthusiastically as he could, Meredith laughing into his shoulder.

"You ever call me a musketeer again I will cut you" They sat laughing for a while, just soaking in each others comfort until Meredith spoke again, her voice filled with a small amount of dread.

"I need to get some things from home" Alex sat up, shaking his head.

"I don't want you to worry about that. Write me a list and I will get it all for you, and then I will bring back some food and rent a movie and we can stay up late and do what girls do when one of them is upset, okay?" Meredith smiled and nodded, moving so he could stand up.

"Well, I don't know what girls do when one of them is upset because I didn't have friends growing up but that sounds about right" Alex rolled his eyes, passing her a pen and paper so she could write him a list. And hour later Alex was out the door, after helping Meredith into bed so she could sleep while he was out. He came up outside her house, spotting Izzie's car making him cringe.

"Great" He muttered, putting the key Meredith had give him in his pocket. He knocked on the door, staring at the list waiting for someone to answer it. He looked up when he heard the door handle turn, Izzie staring at him with a frown.

"I know you don't want to see me, but I need to get some of Mere's things. She gave me a key but I didn't want to just walk in so, I won't be long and you won't even know I am here"

"It's fine, her bedroom is the one opposite the bathroom upstairs" He smiled at her, trying to be as civil as he could while he was there.

"Great, thank you Izz'" He walked past her with a cringe at how easily her nickname slipped off his mouth, but she never said anything as he headed to the stairs.

"Do you want a coffee? I was just about to put a pot on?" She asked, Alex turning to look at the kitchen, fronting when he saw Derek and Cristina looking back him. He looked at Izzie, shaking his head.

"I'm okay, thank you" He continued up the stairs, Izzie going into the kitchen.

"Why is he here?" George asked who was sitting on the kitchen side.

"He is picking some of Mere's things up" She replied shortly, leaning against the wall so she was facing Derek and Cristina.

"So, she is really not coming home?" George asked, his voice full of disappointment. Izzie just shrugged her shoulders, looking down to the floor.

"We are horrible people" Derek said, though they had already gathered that information.

"She is ignoring us just as much as we are her" Izzie defending, Cristina rolling her eyes.

"She has every right to. But I mean, is she honestly going to give us a chance if we knock on Alex's door and say sorry. I wouldn't" George nodded in agreement. They all fell silent, the only nosies behind from Alex upstairs. He was up there for a while, but nobody dared go up and see what he was doing. After a while he started coming down the stairs, them hearing him mumbling to himself from in the kitchen.

"Check, check. Oh damn" Alex had placed a large suitcase at the foot of the stairs containing Meredith's clothes, then another duffle bag with the rest of them. He had filled a large box with her rooms contents and then things form her bathroom, but now he just needed to get things from around the house, though he had no idea where the things were. He knew were her mothers dvd's were, but he was going to struggle with the other items. He also needed to find the attic key to put her mothers things in there. He cringed slightly as he headed to the kitchen, Izzie looking around the door frame when she heard him coming.

"Do you know where the attic key is?" She frowned as she took it off the hook and handed it to him, following him out, the others trailing behind slowly.

"Mere never went into the attic, it gave her the creeps" Derek stated, Alex smiling slightly, thinking back to her advice to him.

"Yeah, she told me it was haunted and to watch out for the old lady who lived up there. She just wanted to me to put the boxes form the office up there, she knew you wanted the office as a study area and wanted me to clear it for you" He said, opening the door, grateful the things were already in boxes and there weren't that many. Once he had out the last box in, he locked it up and handed the key to Izzie who was silently helping him carry the boxes, neither of them speaking a word to each other.

"Thanks" He sent her a smile, Izzie barely sending one back as she followed him down the stairs. She watched him pull out a piece of paper, frowning as she tried to see what was on it.

"What's that?" She asked once the reached the bottom, the others standing around talking.

"Oh it's the list Mere give me, erm- you wouldn't happen to know where the rest of the things are would you?" He hated asking but Meredith hadn't given him much of a guide when sending him with the list. Izzie nodded, taking the list to gather the things. She brought them in a bag, ticking them off with a pencil she had found.

"The picture she wants is in my bedroom, if you want to go and get it" Alex nodded, running up the stairs quickly. Izzie placed the bag by the door with all of Meredith's other things, feeling heartbroken just ever so slightly that they were all in the position they were in.

"Why is Meredith's picture in your room?" George asked Izzie, them not noticing Alex coming down the stairs holding it.

"I put it in there the day after she never come home" She said quietly, although everyone heard. Alex stopped slightly, looking at the back of Izzie's head. Shaking his, he came down the rest of the stairs, catching everyone's attention.

"Found it" He waved it slightly, placing it in one of the boxes. He started loading everything into his car quickly, noticing he had been there for almost 2 hours packing everything up. He came back for the last box, pulling out Meredith's key.

"Mere wanted me to ask if you wanted her key, in case you needed a spare" He told them, Izzie crossing his arms across her chest.

"No it's okay, I got mine cut so I have loads of spare ones" Alex nodded, picking up the box, putting the key back into his pocket.

"I better get off, I promised her I would bring something in for her. She was sick of all the hospital food" He said awkwardly, turning to go out the door, Derek's voice stopping her.

"How is she Karev? I mean, how _is_ she?" Alex didn't turn back to them as he spoke, dipping hid head low slightly as he spoke.

"Honestly, I have never seen anyone so broken" On that he walked out, leaving them all to their thoughts.


	9. Chapter 9

**I like this chapter, so I hope you all like it to! Just going to get on with it really :D**

Addison mentally prepared herself as she attempted to knock on Alex's door, wishing she had just spoken to him in work instead of trekking all the way to his apartment. She held up her hand to knock, sighing when she couldn't will herself to do it. She shook her head and went to walk away, gasping slightly when she saw Alex making his way down the corridor, he looked up from his bag, frowning when he spotted her standing outside his door.

"Dr Montgomery, what are you doing here?" He asked, knowing that after the whole showdown when Meredith was discharged he had quit all formalities with everyone and was only associating with people in a working manner, except for Bailey and Chief who did their check-ups on Meredith and actually held conversations with him about her.

"I was- just leaving" She mumbled, but Alex stopped her pathway, frowning further.

"You must have come here for a reason" He pressed, Addison cringing at his persistency.

"I wanted to speak to you about Meredith but, I shouldn't have come"

"What about her?" He was not letting go of this now.

"I wanted to apologise to her. I haven't been able to sleep because all I can think about is the fact that I am the reason she walked away that night and I am the reason nobody is speaking to her and I am the reason she is in the mess she is in and I want to help her but, it was a mistake to think I could" She rambled, running her hand through her hair stressfully. Alex was shocked at the consideration but he was not ready to forgive her for the mess she made.

"You told her she screwed everything up, do you understand how broken she is?" He argued back, Addison nodding her head.

"I was losing my patient and her kids and Derek told me he wanted a divorce and she was the only person I knew that I could take my frustration out on without being unreasonable, but clearly I took things too far which I never intended to do. She was being considerate about my patient and she had probably had an even worse day than I had but I still did it and I feel so guilty for doing so and I just want her to know that I don't blame her- I never have and I never will" She let out a breath she never realised she was holding, Alex unable to speak. He was shocked when Meredith opened the door, hobbling out slowly, leaning against the door frame.

"Are you both going to come in or finish your argument out here?" Alex watched Addison physically pale, Meredith staring at the two with raised eyebrows.

"I just finished dinner" She mumbled, hobbling back inside, Alex ushering Addison to go first. He was shocked when the apartment was immaculate, knowing he had not left it that way in the morning.

"Have you cleaned?" He asked shocked, Meredith slumping down on the couch with a sigh.

"A little"

"Meredith you are on bed rest" He argued back, but she just shrugged, resting her head back with her eyes closed.

"Addison take a seat, Alex is going to dish out dinner" She said in a sort of cheery voice, Addison and Alex both shocked to say the least.

"Are you sure, I can go I wasn't meaning to stay"

"Think of it as a peace offering" Meredith replied with a small smile, though she never opened her eyes.

"Are you going to have any?" Alex pressed, getting out three plates though he knew her answer.

"Maybe later" He cringed, Addison looking to him with a raised eyebrow.

"Isn't she eating?" She whispered, Alex slowly shaking his head.

"It's very rare I can get food down her" He replied back in a low voice, Addison hating how the past few weeks had effected the woman before her.

"I can't eat your food then if you aren't even go to have any" Addison perked up suddenly, Meredith peering one eye open to stare at her.

"It's fine, I am offering you food"

"Nope, it's against what I believe in" She was persistent, Meredith smirking slightly.

"Fine, help me up Alex" Alex again fell into a state of shock as he helped his friend up and sat her down, dishing out a small but reasonably sized meal onto the plate in front of her. Much to his joy and shock, she at it all along side them, her face brighter and slightly cheery than he had seen in a while.

"I never thought you blamed me" Meredith said suddenly, Addison tilting her head in confusing.

"You said that you wanted me to know that you never blamed me, but I never thought that. You had a right to be angry with me that night and I never blamed you for driving me away. So I want you to stop feeling guilty, please"

"You are in a bad place right now Meredith and I feel partly to blame"

"But you aren't. I am not the happiest girl alive because the man who claims to love me and 3 of my closest friends haven't bothered with me and I can't work for another 6 weeks- I am bored, lonely and heartbroken- but I have Alex. He has been better than anyone has in my entire life and, the friendship is all I need right now. If you are done feeling guilty, I could really use another friend" She admitted, Alex taking her hand under the table slightly, Addison smiling.

"I have surgery tapes in my bag" Meredith couldn't help the large grin that spread across her face as they finished eating as gathered on the sofa, Alex hooking up the videos, them all talking and gushing over the surgeries Addison had brought for Alex to hand over to Meredith. That was the first time Meredith had felt completely settled in a long time, her mind drifting as she wondered if waiting on the others was even worth it, but then the heartache started again when she realised that it had in fact been 2 weeks and Addison of all people was the first person to apologise. It mad ever feel horrible, but she couldn't dwell on it all the time, she had other things to think of.

Over the next week, Addison spent ever possible free hour she had with either Alex or Meredith, the two slowly noticing how she continued to improve, and it reached the 5th week in her 8 week recovery when Meredith was finally released from bed rest and could leave the house on her own back. She knew what this meant, and suddenly her mood was not as great as it had been over the weeks she had been with Addison and Alex. She needed to move hospital.

"Are you sure you want to do that?" Alex complained as they all sat in the conference room, Meredith feeling pressured with Richard, Bailey, Addison and Alex staring down at her.

"I love this hospital, but how am I supposed to pass my internship and survive residency with three of the other interns barking at me and one of the attending's too guilty to make eye contact let alone teach me. I don't think it's fair on me to stay, despite the fact I don't want to leave- and you can't transfer them all so it's only right that I leave" She explained, Richard for the first time in the weeks since she brought it up agreeing.

"She is right. Clearly the others haven't made the effort to make things right, so why should Meredith be the one to make things worse for herself. If they want to feel guilty, let them, but it should not effect her in anyway"

"Thank you" She mouthed to him, Bailey sighing out loud.

"Can't we just sit them down and tell them to be professional or get out?" Alex laughed, shaking his head.

"You think it'll work?" Addison was not about to let Meredith up and leave so she figured a compromise, knowing it would be hard to let it up.

"Well while you find an internship you can work along side us. I mean, you can't not work at all while you wait for the other hospital to evaluate you so at least let us get you some surgeries" Meredith leaned back in thought, her head slowly nodding.

"Okay fine, but I don't want to be on his service. If I have to be on Neuro put me on Shadow Shepherd's service" Richard nodded, him and Bailey exchanging a smile.

"Deal" Alex grinned, knowing he could work on her while she was back and hopefully she won't want to leave at all.

"See you tomorrow for rounds?" Bailey raised her eyebrows, Meredith and Alex standing as she nodded.

"I'll be here" Alex wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they exited the room, neither noticing the 'outcast group' standing to the side watching them. Alex and Meredith stared at each other, them both silent until Meredith burst out laughing, bouncing slightly.

"I'm going to be able to cut someone open tomorrow!" She expressed, Addison exiting the room to a cheering Meredith.

"Out of ten, how desperate are you to cut?" She looked to her, thinking slightly before saying

"Definitely eleven"

"C section with me tomorrow afternoon?" Meredith nodded, the three heading in the direction of the others.

"And you can scrub in with me and Bailey in the morning" Alex commented, Meredith wrapping her arms around both of them, the three heading out to spend the night celebrating in the apartment.

"I knew I was friends with you both for a reason" They both let out a laugh, neither noticing as they passed the others, though Meredith made brief eye contact with Izzie, her eyes filled with sadness and regret. Meredith sent her a small smile before focusing her attention on Alex as they paused at the elevator, resting her head on his shoulder.

"It's all going to be okay right?" She asked, Alex looking down at her.

"It's going to be great"

 **I am so glad her and Addison are** **oaky, but what do you all think is going to happen when she starts work and has to deal with the others and especially Derek…. Tune in for more soon!**


	10. Chapter 10

**My documents for all my stories are a mess and it took me about 4 hours sifting through them all to find this chapter and when I did, I realised I had only done 200 words and was not too impressed so decided to rewrite it all and that took a while, but hey ho I am here now!**

 **Let's just get on with this shall we. Don't forget to review.**

Bailey filed her interns into her patients room, Alex and Meredith closest to his bed while the others stayed to the side, their heads down.

"Dr Karev, present" She said, Alex stepping forward, fist bumping the guy as he grabbed his chart.

"This is David Jones. He is in for the deduction of a mass found on his liver. He has been on dialysis for about 3 months after his other hospital told him he had cancer and needed a new lives. David collapsed at work as was brought here where Dr Bailey found that his mass was not cancer and could easily be removed" Bailey nodded, smiling at David.

"Grey" Meredith was next to speak, having read up every detail on David's case the night before.

"We are going to go in and remove the mass and hopefully get David home by the end of the week" David laughed, holding up his fist for Meredith to bump.

"I like her Dr Bailey" He laughed, Meredith rolling her eyes at laughed along, the others standing on the side lines awkwardly.

"Karev and Grey are going to prepare you for you surgery. I will see you in the OR" She practically pushed the others out to their patients, Meredith and Alex leaving the room to run the last round of labs on David before he went in.

"It feels so good to be back" She admitted to Alex, a grin on her face. He hadn't seen her so happy in so long it relieved a large weight off his shoulders.

"David likes you" Alex winked, Meredith rolling her eyes. They never noticed Derek behind them on the stairs, Meredith pushing Alex's arm slightly.

"I am not dating anyone for a long time. The pain is way too unbearable" She was half joking half serious which Alex understood, though Derek who was listening in felt a large pang of guilt overwhelm him.

"I heard the head of general at Seattle Pres is hot, maybe I can get in his pants when I transfer" She winked, Alex letting out a loud laugh as they headed to the lab pick up, Derek's eyes wide as he stopped dead in his tracks. He was so engrossed on the back of Meredith's head he never noticed Addison who walked right into him, snapping her out of his haze.

"Sorry Dr Shepherd" She mumbled, going to walk away when he grabbed her arm, holding her back.

"Meredith is transferring?" She raised an eyebrow at him, turning so she was facing him.

"Who told you that?"

"I overheard her mention something before"

"So you are listening into conversations now?"

"No it wasn't like that. Is she though?" She crossed her arms over her chest, resisting the urge to roll her eyes.

"Why do you care Derek? I have had to deal with her these past few weeks and she is so broken, so yes, I think transferring would be a better for her considering nobody is speaking to her but honestly, I would hate to see her leave. This- being here with all of you, it is hurting her Derek. Are we done?" He gulped loudly, Addison turning on her heal in the opposite direction.

* * *

Meredith stepped back from the body, staring at Alex wide eyed as Bailey stepped down from the stool she uses for surgeries, her face grim. She looked at me, but I couldn't make eye contact with her as I spoke.

"Time of death, 10.34" I ripped off my surgical gown and gloves, shoving them in the bin as I headed to the door.

"Grey, we couldn't have known this" I grabbed the handle and sighed, looking down at my shoes.

"I know, but an hour ago he was telling me how he was going to adopt a puppy and now he is going to the morgue" She pulled the door open and walked away, Alex going to walk away but Bailey held him back, shaking her head.

"Leave her for a few minutes" He nodded and looked up at the gallery, Izzie and George looking down at him sadly.

"Leave everyone for a few minutes" She rephrased, Alex rolling his eyes as he walked out the door into the scrub room.

* * *

Meredith sat in the locker room for a minute to control herself before slowly standing to leave. She didn't know whether it was because it was her first day back because she is never usually this knocked by a patient dying. There was just something about him, he was an amazing person and now he is dead. Bad things always happen to the best of people. Taking a deep breathe, she pulled the door open, the wind being knocked out of her when she almost ran over Izzie, a small smile on her face.

"Dr Stevens" She greeted courteously, smiling back.

"I'm sorry about your patient. I was in the gallery and the surgery was going so well"

"He just didn't have a strong enough heart" Izzie nodded sadly, moving out the way so she could pass.

"Good luck with your Craniotomy, I saw you down for it on the board"

"Thank you" They shared a brief moment, like everything that had happened was in the wind for a moment. It felt nice, for the both of them. In an instant, gravity took hold and it was all on the ground again.

"Meredith, Seattle Pres will be in at 4pm to meet with you about the possible transfer. Don't be late" Meredith turned to Richard, smiling with a nod.

"I have to go" She slipped away from a gobsmacked Izzie, who immediately went to find Cristina and George. The two were sitting in the tunnels, picking at their salads, neither bothering to make small talk. Izzie stood in front of them, the two staring at her with raised eyebrows.

"Meredith is transferring to Seattle Pres"

"What!?" Cristina was standing now, her face full of sadness.

"Meredith is transferring. She is meeting with them at 4. Why would she do that? She only just came back"

"First she moves out, now she leaves the hospital?" George didn't know whether to be upset or angry. He didn't know if he had the right to feel anything anymore. They all stood in silence, daring each other to speak but in all honesty, they didn't know what to say. Izzie felt herself go white when she heard someone behind them, placing her hand on her chest when she saw Derek.

"We have a Craniotomy" He told her, Izzie nodding.

"Did you know about Meredith moving?" Cristina asked him, his nod shocking them.

"And you're not angry?" He shook his head, George frowning.

"Do you know why?" He nodded, Izzie egging him to tell them more.

"Addison told me she is a mess and its hurting her being here. This is our fault" His voice was so broken, he didn't know what to do anymore. Neither of them did.

"She can't leave. We need to fix this, now" George said, Derek turning around.

"We have ruined her, maybe she doesn't want us to fix it" Cristina grabbed his arm, turning him back around, her eyes wide.

"We can't give up. We have treated her like crap and we are going to fix it. Come on Derek, don't let this be it. This can't be it" He sighed, looking around the interns who, including him, had ruined the one best thing in his life. Slowly he nodded, Izzie sighing heavily.

"Okay, where do we start?"

 **Do you think it will work? Will she take them back after what they did or will she move hospitals? You decide! What do you think she should do? The most votes will win, I have ideas for either way so get voting.**


	11. Chapter 11

**So ya'll voted and I am pleased to say that Meredith is… Wait? Why would I tell you? Never mind, you will just have to wait and find out what Meredith decides ;) Thank you for all the reviews and messages casting your votes and also thank you for your patience. We still have a good few chapters to go with this story so I hope I still have you all hooked.**

 **Don't forget to review and enjoy!**

Meredith exited the confrence room with the head of surgery at Seattle Pres, the other interns coming down the stairs, spotting Alex who had been waiting outside the room for her. They all overheard the tall woman speak, her voice filled with joy.

"We would be happy to have you Dr Grey, I will await your call. And I am glad you are well again!" They shook hands, Meredith's face glowing.

"Thank you so much Dr Thompson, I will be in contact with you by the end of the week" The departed from each other, Alex hiding his hurt behind a huge grin, Meredith coming up to him.

"So, how did it go? Was she terrible?" He joked, Meredith shaking her head.

"She was amazing actually. There something fresh about her that I really liked"

"So, you are leaving?" She sighed, wrapping her arm around his shoulder as they headed off in the direction of the changing room.

"I don't know Alex, probably. I know you are really against me going but, it's not like I am going far, and I will still be living with you. I mean, it's not like I can go back to my house. You know, I spoke to Izzie today" He raised his eyebrows, them stopping in their tracks.

"Really?" She nodded, running her hand through her hair.

"It was okay, I mean we talked about surgery. But it felt nice, you know. I have missed her, I have missed them all. So, maybe things will start looking up"

"Which is exactly why you should't leave" He argued weakly, but she shrugged, a heavy sigh escaping her lips.

"Come on, I am starving. We can pick up pizza on the way home"

"I'll meet you in there" She nodded and headed up, Alex leaning against the nurses station in thought. He spotted the others and slowly approached them, an awkward smile covering his face.

"Hey" They all returned the smile, Izzie jumping right into it.

"Is it true that Mer is transferring?"

"She seems pretty adamant on it, unless I can change her mind"

"Can we help?" Cristina butted in, Alex frowning.

"We know, we have been horrible but now is our chance to make amends. We don't want her to leave any more than you do, so let us stop it" He crossed his arms across his chest, tilting his head in thought.

"You honestly think she is just going to accept you all back after what you put her through" Izzie cringed, George standing up to speak.

"It's worth a try right?"

"What exactly have you got in mind?"

"Come around for dinner tonight. Derek will be there, just, try and get her to mingle with us again" He sighed, running his hand down his face.

"If she finds out we are setting her up she will kill us, all of us"

"We know, but she have to try anyway" He nodded, turning around to leave.

"7pm" He shouted back, them all grinning towards each other. Alex headed to the changing room where Meredith was already dressed, sitting on the bench putting her shoes on.

"Hey, erm, Cristina just came up to me" He slid in next to her, Meredith raising an eyebrow as she looked up.

"Really? What happened?"

"She was wondering if we wanted to go around for dinner" Meredith laughed slightly, wondering if he was being serious. When he cringed she sat up straight, looking him dead in the eye.

"Seriously? Why?" He shrugged, Meredith narrowing her eyes at him.

"I guess that would be okay. Is it just Cristina?"

"Maybe the others, and she said Derek might be there, but I don't know" She felt uncomfortable all of a sudden, wondering what kind of game they were playing.

"I don't know Alex"

"Come on Mer, you said you missed them, maybe this is the chance you should take to start, I don't know, getting civil with them all again" She sighed, nodding her head.

"I guess so" He grinned, standing to get changed. Once they were ready they headed home to get into nicer clothes, the both of them ready by 6.45pm.

"Does this look okay?" She asked suddenly, Alex turning around to look at her. She had a black laced vest top on with a pair of jeans and black pumps on.

"Amazing. Are you ready?" She sighed and nodded, them leaving with a bottle of wine. It was only fair they brought something considering Izzie was cooking them dinner. They pulled up outside, Meredith feeling her heart pounding in her chest. It felt like another life time ago since she had last stepped for in her house.

"Maybe this wasn't such a great idea" She stated, Alex turning to her in the car.

"Hey, it's okay. I am going to be here the entire time" The look of true sincerity in his face calmed her, him squeezing her hand before they got out, heading up the porch. Meredith rang the bell, Izzie running to the door still with her apron on. Her smile was way too forced to make things comfortable.

"Hey! I am so glad you two could make it! Come in" Alex held out the wine, Izzie taking it from them.

"Dinner will be ready in 10. Everyone is in the living area" She ushered them in, Alex hanging his jacket up in the hall, watching as Izzie rushed back into the kitchen. They headed into the living area slowly, Cristina and George standing to greet them.

"You came!" George expressed happily, Meredith sending them both a small smile.

"We did, and we brought wine" They all laughed, the door going again.

"I'll get that" Meredith told them, slipping out. She felt her heart sink at the sight of Derek on the other side of the door. She opened it up, Derek turning around, a small smile appearing his face.

"Hey" He whispered, Meredith moving out the way for him to enter.

"Dinner will be ready in 10" She quietly told him, walking away back to the others. Once Derek had shut the door and hung up his coat, he couldn't help but notice how Meredith had made the effort to go to the opposite side of the room, even going all out to stand with Cristina instead of Alex who was watching her like a hawk. They all fell into a small and awkward group conversation, Izzie painfully watching from the sidelines. He dinner party was not going as she had planned. Maybe the food will liven everyones spirits up.

"Dinner is ready!" She exclaimed, Meredith sending everyone a small smile.

"Let's eat" She stated, Izzie going to wrap her arm around her shoulder, but covered it up terribly with a stretch, Meredith inwardly cringing. _Why did I agree to this?_ They all dug into the lasagne that Izzie had cooked from scratch, smiles of delight dancing across the table.

"This is amazing Izzie" Meredith commented quietly from the end of the table, Izzie sending her a considerate smile back.

"I'm glad you like it! My own recipe"

"Who knows, maybe you'll publish a cook book one day" Meredith hated how awkwardly things were flying from her mouth but she just couldn't think of things to say. _Hey, I am still hating on you all for treating me like crap but thanks for the food! No chance._

"What is for dessert?" George asked suddenly, sending Meredith's uncomfortableness from on the other end of the table where he was sitting next to Derek.

"Home made Apple Pie with cream" Izzie told him, everyone nodding slowly, eating away silently again. Nobody dared to speak again, nobody uttering another word until the desert plates were emptied 20 minutes later.

"Wine anyone?" Izzie offered, trying but failing to keep up her smile. This was going horrifically.

"Actually, I am feeling really tired so, I think I am just going to head home. Thank you for the amazing food Iz" Meredith stood from the table, Alex going to stand but she stopped him, hating that they were across from each other so everyone could see the interaction.

"No it's okay, I can, erm, walk home" She cringed and left as quickly as she could, the fresh air hitting her like a pillow. It was comforting. She heard footsteps coming after her as she headed down the porch, turning around expecting to see Alex, the wind suddenly being knocked out of her when Derek was before her, one of his oh so adorable smiles on his face.

"Derek, hi" She felt like slapping herself.

"Hey, are you okay?" It was like they were back in high school, the awkwardness between them cuttable with a scalpel.

"Yeah just, really tired" She wasn't actually lying. It had been a draining day, and it was her own fault accepting the dinner invitation when she knew she was not ready for it.

"I am sorry about the patent you lost"

"Thank you, I guess it was just hard for the first day"

"I know how you feel, remember Katie Bryce? For my first day it was a draining case" She smiled slightly at the memory. One patient she would certainly not forget.

"The rhythmic gymnastic. How could I forget?" They laughed. Meredith couldn't help but admire how smoothly the conversation was going, Derek thinking the exact same thing.

"I have a tumour removal on Thursday. I still don't have an intern to assist me. If you are up for it, I would love your hands back in surgery with me" She felt her heart stop.

"I would love that Derek, thank you" She smiled, nodding her head.

"See you then- I will bring the coffee" She laughed, watching as he turned around to head back inside.

"I'll bring the bagels" She heard his laugh from at the bottom of the driveway, smiling to herself as she headed down the road. Maybe things were looking up after all.

 **Dinner parties are not really the characters favourite things are they? They always seem to end in the most awkward of ways! *cough* Perfect Penny killed my husband *cough*… I am still not over that… * E***

 **In other news… Is Meredith really ready to forgive, and will reigniting her love with Derek stop her from transferring? Stay tuned for more soon!**


	12. Chapter 12

**I actually really liked this chapter so I hope you all do to. I was thinking of ending this story soon and considering a sequel to it. Drop me a message or review to share your thoughts on that.**

 **Enjoy and don't forget to review!**

As promised, Meredith and Derek met up early on Thursday morning, Meredith with two bagels in a bag and Derek with two coffees. They planned the surgery out and after discussing it with the patient they were all set to go. They headed to the scrub room, bumping into Alex and Izzie on the way.

"Hey you left really early this morning" Alex complained to Meredith who avoided eye contact, nodding her head.

"I had a surgery to plan out" She excused herself quickly and left the three looking after her confused. Ever since the dinner party two days ago she had been avoiding everyone. She knew they were trying to get back into her good books and the fact that Alex was helping them insulted her on many levels. Being civil in work was fine, but a few meals and bottles of wine is not going to fix what they did.

"What's going on between you two?" Izzie asked, knowing that if she was being off with Alex there was no chance of them making amends.

"I don't know. She has been avoiding me" He took off after her, finding her in the scrub room.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing. I have a surgery now"

"Yes you mentioned. I mean, why are you avoiding me?" She shrugged in response, Alex groaning.

"Meredith come on!" He turned to him slightly, her patience wavering.

"Alex I am not really in the mood for this right now. I will see you later" He huffed and stormed out, Meredith throwing her scrub brush into the sink in annoyance. Taking in a deep breath, she continued scrubbing, putting on her facade as Derek walked in, a smile on his face.

"All set?" She nodded, smiling widely.

"Let's do this" The surgery went smoothly, 5 hours and 26 minutes later the two watching as the patient was wheeled to recovery.

"We did it!" She grinned happily, Derek admiring her with adoring eyes.

"Yes we did, you did amazing work today Meredith"

"As did you. I'll scrub out and go and round on him now" She was eager for him to wake up, excited to see if their surgery had been a complete success without any lasting damage. She sighed heavily as she reached his room, letting her façade fall slightly as she stared down at the patient. She understood how he felt, all alone with no family after such a big surgery. It wasn't that long ago that she was in a similar position to him; lying on a hospital bed recovering, no hand holding his limp on begging him to wake up. Sure he had a tumour and she had been in a crash but still, the loneliness was entirely relatable. She felt a sudden rage build up but pushed it down, knowing it was going to get her nowhere bubbling on what happened, but still, with Alex playing matchmaker she couldn't help but be extremely angry. He had been so good to her during her recovery and such but this was just going too far. She was snapped out of her daze when she felt a hand on her shoulder, seeing Addison behind her. She had been away for a few days doing a tricky surgery at Seattle Pres.

"All the nurses are talking about how amazing you were in surgery" She commented, the two slipping out of the room to talk better.

"I only helped, it wasn't like I did it solo" She shrugged, Addison rolling her eyes.

"Always so modest Meredith" They laughed, Meredith sighing slightly.

"I have missed you"

"I was only gone for 3 days, and I wasn't far" Addison frowned, Meredith rolling her eyes.

"I meant being here. Alex is starting to side with the others again and I am trying to not let it get to me, but I can't help but feel so angry. I don't mind being civil while here, but I can't help but think he wants everything back to the way it was, and I can't do that" Meredith didn't have to say it, but Addison knew exactly what she meant.

"You're leaving aren't you?"

"In 2 days"

"I got an offer as well" Meredith's face perked up slightly, her eyes flickering to her patient before settling on Addison.

"Explain" She laughed, setting her bag on the counter, sitting on the computer chair behind the nurse's station.

"I told the chief of surgery that the patient could have been moved here, but she was very persistent on me doing the surgery at their hospital. I didn't mind of course but still, most people would prefer to waste other hospital's goods than their own" Meredith nodded knowing that was extremely true.

"So I go there and brief the patient and the surgery team and I with hours of having nothing to do, I wondered around. You wouldn't believe how amazing their facilities are. I mean, we are one of the best but there was just something, I don't know, fresh about them. After the surgery I was waiting for the patient to come around and I had another walk around and bumped into Dr Thompson. She bought be coffee and said that if I wanted, a position was open ready for me to take. She also mentioned you and said 'she had a feeling you wouldn't say no and looked forward to working with you'" Meredith's eyebrows rose, a small smile on her face.

"She is really nice" Addison laughed, her head nodding.

"She is. I just, I feel like I am betraying Richard. He is a close friend and I just, do I really want to risk losing that for some new scenery?" Meredith agreed, she felt like she was betraying someone who she has been close to her entire life but, she wasn't going to lie, she was really looking forward to the change.

"I grew up here. Playing tag in the scrub rooms, sleeping in the on-call rooms, colouring in the gallery- I know why I am leaving. I am leaving because all I think about when I am here is how my mom ruled these walls and how I could never stand up to the shadow she left behind, and that I want to prosper somewhere knew without her techniques following my every move. Richard has been amazing, but after everything that has happened I don't think I can move on while being here" Addison looked at her lost friend sadly, knowing that the past few months have had a lasting mark on the woman and she shouldn't feel the way she does. She was partly the blame for what happened, so it is only fair she helps as much as possible.

"I know you came here looking for Derek, and the fact I got in the way must have been hard, but what is tying you here really?" The question lingered in her mind for a few minutes, the two sitting in silence.

"Let's transfer together" She spoke up suddenly, Meredith's eyes narrowing.

"Really?"

"Why not? I mean, I have come to like Seattle so I might as well enjoy it with the fullest potential, and with everything that has happened, I can't do that. And you deserve to be able to move on, so why not do it together. It's a familiar face around Pres anyway" Meredith pondered on the thought, nodding her head slowly.

"Let's do it" Addison stood, knowing that she needed to warn Richard and would rather do it sooner than later and have herself break the news than Dr Thompson.

"Can I ask you another favour before you leave?" Meredith said, suddenly feeling awkward before her now very close friend.

"Anything"

"I haven't told Alex yet, and I have a feeling it isn't going to end well. So I was wondering, until I get myself back on my feet, could I stay in your apartment for a few weeks? It will just be until I can find a place nearby"

"Meredith, of course you can! I am heading home now, would you like me, to get a head start while you speak to Alex" She passed her keys to the red head, nodding her head.

"Thank you" The two separated, Meredith going back to the patient, knowing that she needed to speak to Alex but she wasn't sure on how to break the news. She felt herself jump when someone knocked on the door, frowning when the man she was just thinking about was in the doorway, his stupid little smirk she teased him about covering his face.

"You did great in surgery"

"Thank you- I was actually just about to come and find you" She cringed at how awkwardly it came out, Alex frowning.

"Is everything okay?"

"I'm transferring Alex, in 2 days" She blurted out, his face dropping suddenly.

"Wait? You're actually going to leave! I thought we were working on things"

"Yeah about that as well, I understand that you wanted me to be civil with the others in work, but trying to force them back into my life isn't going to make me forgive them! You have been working slyly on the side with them and I feel really betrayed Alex"

"Betrayed? You are the one leaving!"

"Because my life is hell here Alex! Do you understand how much it pains me being here?" She was trying not to raise her voice but she was done. Done with him being on their side suddenly. She stormed out the room, Alex following her in a huff.

"You were starting to make friends though, this past week has been okay"

"No Alex, this past week I have been civil, but a meal and some coffee breaks together is not going to fix everything they did. You hated them for so long Alex, why are you suddenly on their side?"

"Because I don't want you to leave!" Meredith stopped short, turning to face him, her face suddenly wet from the tears leaking from her eyes.

"You did all this because you don't want me to leave? You tried to force them back into my life because you thought it would make me stay? That is low Alex, even for you" The two stared at each other in the middle of the hall, Meredith's hair's standing up on the back of her neck when the others came around the corner, sharing looks when the approached.

"Hey, is everything okay?" Izzie asked, Meredith rubbing her face dry, looking away from Alex.

"Fine. We were just discussing my transfer" Cristina stepped forward, Meredith not bothering to look at any of them.

"You're leaving? You're actually going to leave"

"I am. Expect my stuff to be out of your apartment by tonight" She spat harshly, storming away back to her patient's room, slamming the door shut behind her, sitting next to the sleeping man, his chart tightly gripped in her hand.

"Come on Robert, don't let my last surgery be a failure. Wake up for me"


	13. Chapter 13- Final Chapter

**Guess what, this is the last chapter people! Last chapter and sooner or later I will be starting a sequel for this but for now, I hope you enjoy!**

 **Don't forget to review people!**

Alex stood with Izzie, Cristina and Derek not far from Richard's office, watching through the window as he sat opposite Addison, Meredith and a woman they assumed was the head of surgery. They remembered her from when Meredith first had a meeting with her. In the office, Meredith looked awkwardly at the floor, hating how she felt like she was abandoning Richard.

"Both of your transfers have gone through perfectly. Today will be your last day and you will both report to Seattle Pres first thing Monday morning" Richard told the two, Meredith grateful for the 4 days off, giving her time to apartment hunt and just relax. She has been with Addison for a week (the transfer being pushed back due to meetings and such) having not spoken to any of the others since her spat with Alex and, although it pained her, she had never felt freer.

"I look forward to seeing you in my office on Monday. I am extremely happy you both took on my offer, thank you so much" Dr Thompson shook both Meredith and Addison's hand before sharing an awkward head nod with Richard before exiting out the door. Once she was gone, Bailey barged in the room, Meredith jumping at the door slam.

"You are both leaving. Both of you. Together" She snapped, Addison sliding down in her chair slightly.

"I have promised to split time so I will be back here from time to time, and you still know where I live"

"But we are losing both of you!" She argued weakly, Richard eyeing up Meredith who was fiddling with her fingers silently.

"This is really what you both want?" He asked one final time, Addison looking to Meredith who still never spoke up.

"Mere?" She nudged her, Meredith looking up with sad eyes.

"I'm sorry" Richard walked around his desk and stood her up, wrapping his arms around her.

"Don't apologise. I understand" He sighed, feeling as though he was losing a daughter as she pulled away, nodding her head.

"I want to double check on some patients before I leave" She said, slipping away, mainly from Bailey who was after her like a rocket.

"Meredith Grey!" She shouted, Meredith stopping short, cringing slightly.

"I have patients" She stated, Bailey pushing her into an empty examination room.

"You have been avoiding me all week" She crossed her arms over her chest, Meredith looking away from her narrowed eyes.

"I have been busy, with paperwork and, stuff" Bailey approached her, sighing heavily as she placed a hand on the woman's arm causing her to make eye contact.

"I am going to miss you Grey" She whispered, Meredith shaking her head, a small smile on my face.

"What happened to hating me and always hating me?" Bailey laughed alongside her, breathing in deeply before wrapping her up in a hug.

"You deserve to fly high Grey, and I know this is the right call. Don't forget us okay?"

"You'll see me again" She laughed, falling into the hug happily before they pulled away, Meredith blinking away the tears.

"If you can you should come around to Addison's this weekend. I'll probably still be there, I have nowhere else to go" She joked slightly, Bailey nodding. She watched her slip out the room, getting a hold of her emotions before exiting the room and heading in the opposite direction past Richard's office again. She couldn't help but silently eye up her other interns and McDick, which is what she now called him. How could they have ruined such a good thing? She always thought Meredith would be just like her mother but upon meeting her she knew she would be a better person, and an even better surgeon, and she respected that.

The day went by and Meredith felt her whole mood change suddenly. She had bid her patients farewell and saved Robert for last. She took a deep breath and walked in the room, Robert turning to look at her, his face lighting up. He had started recovering well from his surgery much to her amazement and would be going home in a week.

"Hi Dr Grey, look what I have been practicing" He lifted his hand up and gripped the stress ball in his hand hard before releasing it and lowering his hand back, Meredith applauding him with a sad smile.

"You are doing very well Robert I am impressed" She picked up his chart, glad to see his numbers were normal and he was on the road to being relatively normal once again.

"I knew you would be in here today" She frowned, sitting on the edge of his bed, picking up the stress ball for him to catch, watching happily as he caught the ball and threw it back to her. They continued this, carrying on with their conversation as they did.

"How come?"

"It's your last day, I knew you couldn't leave without saying goodbye" She smiled again with sad eyes, Robert catching the ball and leaning forward slightly to grab her hand. Meredith never noticed Derek standing not far from the room as she continued talking, a tear rolling down her cheek.

"You have got to be my favourite patient, so how could I not come and say goodbye" He laughed, leaning back so they could carry on playing catch.

"Of course I am your favourite, you can't get enough of me" He winked, Meredith letting her façade fall further as she laughed along with him.

"I am still going to come and visit you in your last week here, so make sure you put me on your visitation list okay?" He nodded, giving the ball a squeeze before throwing it back.

"So, does that mean I can't be a terrible patient because you are still going to keep track of me?" Meredith raised her eyebrows sternly as she threw the ball at him, tutting slightly.

"No Robert, I want to hear only good things from the nurses when I come back in here. No skipping your medication, no ripping your IV out, and no giving Dr Shepherd grief"

"But he treated my favourite lady unfairly" He pouted, Meredith laughing.

"I don't care. Promise me you will be good" He sighed and held up his pinky, Meredith liking hers with his happily.

"I promise" They continued chatting while throwing the ball, Richard and Addison coming up to find Derek outside the room staring inside dreamily.

"Rounds?" Richard asked, Derek nodding.

"It seems Dr Grey beat me to it" The two looked into the room to find Meredith had now stood up and was moving around more to give Robert more of a challenge, her smile lighting up the room. They both knew it was what Robert needed considering he was alone.

"Is this Robert?" Addison asked, Richard nodding.

"It is, I saw her put a request in to be added to his visitation list"

"He just needs to confirm it. I think she wants to see him in the last week" They nodded, Addison watching as Meredith gave the man a hug and left the room, looking up suddenly to see them staring at her, her façade building its self-back up.

"Are you ready?" Addison asked, Meredith nodding.

"I just need to get my bag" She told Addison, the woman telling her she will meet her at the reception, walking off.

"Addison has asked me around tomorrow night so I will see you then?" Richard said, Meredith smiling with a nod as the man walked off also, leaving her and Derek standing awkwardly before one another.

"Thank you for helping Robert, I know the nurses really appreciate it considering he isn't the best patient" Meredith nodded, looking back to see he was still playing with the ball.

"He is a good guy, I will be in for the last week to see him and such so I will make sure he keeps up his good behaviour" Derek nodded, Meredith going to walk away but he grabbed her wrist stopping her, Meredith turning back with a head shake.

"Derek I can't do this. Not now"

"You can't just leave. I need you here Meredith"

"I have to move on Derek. I can't stay here, not after everything that has happened. Please understand that" The emotion in her voice killed him as he let go of her wrist, Meredith turning away.

"I love you" She whispered and before he could reply, she was gone. Sighing heavily, he leaned against the wall and slid down slightly, his heart breaking. He looked up when he saw Izzie, Alex, Cristina and George walking out of the elevator, them approaching him with a frown.

"She is gone, isn't she?" He nodded, releasing a shaky breath.

"She is" They all shared a look, the moment dawning on them as they realised it was all their fault.

"We deserve this, I don't think she should have stayed, I'm glad she has gone because we deserve all of this" Izzie complained, knowing that if it wasn't for the way they had acted she would be fine and the crash would never have happened and everything would be fine. But no, they had acted irrationally, Meredith had crashed, they had left her and now this was her punishment.

"I can't believe she is actually gone" Cristina whispered sadly.

/

Meredith and Addison sat side by side on the sofa, a bottle of wine each in their hand as she clinked bottles, taking a long and thoughtful sip each.

"Come Monday we will start fresh. New people, new patients, new hospital, new everything" Addison sighed happily, Meredith laughing.

"Thank you, for being here for me. Out of all the people who left me alone, I never would have thought you would be the one to pick up the pieces so thank you for being here. Thank you for not leaving me alone" Addison grabbed Meredith's hand and nodded, leaning her head back.

"It's just you and me Meredith, you, me and Seattle Pres" They both laughed, Meredith taking another sip of the wine with one simple thought going through her head. _What could go wrong?_


End file.
